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Coming face-to-face with your inadequacies can be painful, to say the least. It challenges the way that you believe people see you and even makes you question yourself. 1.. But handling negative feedback properly will not only make you look well-behaved, but it could eventually help you grow as a person. Here’s how to do it.

Be objective about criticism

Before you jump to conclusions and begin to challenge the other person’s opinion, take a step back and look at it allsidedly. 2., don’t immediately allow your emotions to get the better of you, but rather, take a moment to consider whether the criticism is at all accurate.3..

Be open to the idea of change

4.. And it may be because of a concept called “cognitive dissonance” (认知失调) that can prevent us from changing even when that’s what we need most. “People have a view of themselves or the world that they only seek to confirm, not adjust or change,” Dr. Benn, a psychologist explains. “They may ignore criticism because they wish to avoid having to change, or because it makes them feel bad, or because they feel it is not helpful.”

Ask questions

If you’re open to using the criticism as a springboard to improvement, you will likely need more information. The initial moment you hear the criticism may not be the best time to ask for more details. Your emotions will be riding high, and you may not be particularly willing to accept extra information. 5.. “Engage with the person who criticized you, asking what you can do differently or how you can do better,” says Dr. Benn. Even if you don’t agree with their advice, thank them and promise to consider it.

A. Most of us are pretty stubborn

B. When you can’t hear clearly

C. Next time you get a bad review

D. Your immediate reaction may be to defend yourself

E. But it’s best to avoid getting into an argument

F. Give yourself a chance to really take in the information and evaluate it

G. However, when you feel ready, it could be worth revisiting the subject with the person who criticized you

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