Question

根据下面的对话内容，以第三人称写一篇记叙文。词数：100词左右。

Tom：I bought two books here half an hour ago，but I forgot to take them with me．

Manager：Who served you，sir？

Tom：The lady who is standing behind the counter

Manager：Did you serve the gentleman half an hour ago，Miss Jones？

Miss Jones：I can't remember，sir．The man I served was wearing a hat．

Manager：Have you got a hat，sir？

Tom：Yes，I have．

Manager；Would you put it on，please？

Tom：All right．

Manager：Is this the man you served just now，Miss Jones？

Miss Jones：Yes，sir，I recognize him now．

Answer 1

答案：
解析：

One day，Tom bought two books in a shop，but he forgot taking①them with him．So half an hour later he returned to the shop． 　　The manager of the shop asked Tom who②served him．Tom told him she③was a lady standing behind the counter that served him．The manager asked Miss Jones that④she had served Tom half an hour before，She said she couldn't remember．But she only remembered the customer was⑤served by her was wearing a hat．So the manager asked Tom if he had got a hat．Tom nodded．Then the manager told him to put on the hat．When Miss Jones saw Tom put the hat on，she recognized him immediately．Then Tom got his two books back． 　　修改：①taking→to take forget doing sth．意为“忘记已经做了某事”，显然此处不合文意，改为forget to do sth．的形式，即“忘记要做某事”才对。故此处taking改为to take。 　　②加上had 此处语境所表达的是“过去的过去”，应在served前加had，构成过去完成时态。 　　③she→it 此处句型结构应为强调句，其结构为：It is＋被强调部分＋that从句。故此处she应改为it。 　　④that→if／whether 主句谓语为asked，故此处that应改为if／whether。 　　⑤去掉was或加上who／that 此处去掉was是过去分词作定语；如保留was，则应在served前加关系代词构成定语从句才可以。　　评点：本文是将一段对话改写为一篇短文。做好这种写作的关键在于读懂原对话，改写时注意人称、时态等基本要素的正确运用。本文总体上改写得不错，不足之处在于少数词法运用不准确。同学们所学的课本都配有相应的对话，如能将所学的对话都能改写为短文，坚持下去就会写出较好的文章来。