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We can make mistakes at any age. Some mistakes we make are about money, but most mistakes are about people. “Did Jerry really care when I broke up with Helen?” “When I got that great job, did Jim really feel good about it, as a friend? Or did he envy my luck?” When we look back, doubts like these can make us feel bad. But when we look back, it’s too late.

Why did we go wrong about our friends or our enemies? Sometimes what people say hides their real meaning. And if we don’t really listen, we miss the feeling behind the words. Suppose someone tells you, “You’re a lucky dog.” Is he really on your side? If he says, “You’re a lucky guy” or “You’re a lucky gal”, that’s being friendly. But “lucky dog”? There’s a bit of envy in those words. Maybe he doesn’t see it himself. But bringing in the “dog” bit puts you down a little. What he may be saying is that he doesn’t think you deserve your luck.

“Just think of all the things you have to be thankful for” is another noise that says one thing and means another. It could mean that the speaker is trying to get you to see your problem as part of your life as a whole. But is he? Being wrapped(包裹)up in this expression is the thought that your problem isn’t important. It’s telling you to think of all the starving people in the world when you haven’t got a date for Saturday night.

How can you tell the real meaning behind someone’s words? One way is to take a good look at the person talking. Do his words fit the way he looks? Does what he says consist with the tone of voice? His posture? The look in his eyes? Stop and think. The minute you spend thinking about the real meaning of what people say to you may save another mistake.

1.When recalling(回忆)things that have happened between our friends and us, we may .

A. feel good to have friends standing by us

B. think it was a mistake to view some people as friends

C. misread some of our friends’ true feelings

D. keep looking back to find mistakes we’ve made

2.By saying “You’re a lucky dog,” the speaker .

A. is just being friendly

B. expresses the same meaning as “You’re a lucky guy”

C. may have a hidden envious feeling

D. intends to put the listener down

3.In listening to a person, the important thing is .

A. to listen carefully to how he utters his words

B. to observe his tone, his posture, and his clothes

C. to stop for a while and decide whether to believe him

D. to check his words against his manner, tone and posture

4.This passage tries to tell you how to .

A. avoid mistakes in understanding what people tell you

B. say things appropriately to avoid mistakes

C. keep people always faithful to you

D. avoid regret about making mistakes

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