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How to be a good listener
Everyone loves a good listener. But there are more reasons to develop the skill of listening than to win hearts or popularity contests.
Listening heals hurts and builds bridges. It gives us the ability to understand and empathize, to view the world from our own point. It can bring us wisdom over and above mere intelligence. But most importantly, it allows us to give the people around us the gifts they crave (渴望) most—a sense of worth.
As it turns out, there’s more to good listening than just keeping quiet and allowing someone to speak. Effective listening is actually a combination of two key communication skills: listening and verifying (确认).
Even when we’ve managed to hear a person’s entire message, we often interpret it wrong—according to our own understanding, experience, or prejudice.
As an effective listener, your goal is to hear and absorb what another has to say…in exactly the way they mean it to be understood. Only then can you respond properly.
This is much easier read than done, so here are a few helpful tips:
1. Give the speaker your full attention.
Stop talking and remove all distractions. Turn off the TV, your phone, or computer. Watch your body language. The way you look at the speaker, or the way you stand or sit, makes a huge difference. The right listening body language communicates that we are listening openly and attentively, and puts the other person at ease.
2. Be patient.
Not everyone is a gifted speaker. Some people take longer to find the right word to make a point. Others are too worried to get their message across properly. If necessary, ask the speaker to explain further. It will help him / her speak more exactly and it will help you hear and understand better.
3. Keep your emotions in check.
If what someone is saying creates an emotional response in you, make an extra effort to listen carefully. When we’re angry, frightened or upset, we often miss key parts of what is being said.
4. Hold your fire.
Don’t jump to conclusions immediately. A good listener doesn’t react until comprehension is complete. If you respond in a way that makes the other person defensive, even if you “win” the argument, you may lose something far more valuable.
5. Even if you think you understand. VERIFY.
Never assume you got the message right. Pause, think about what was said, and then ask “Is this what you meant?” or “Am I understanding this right?”
6. Empathize.
Take a moment to stand in the other person’s shoes, to look at the situation from his / her point of view…especially when you’re being told something personal or painful, or something you strongly disagree with. The more shoes you are able to successfully stand in within your life time, the less puzzled you’ll find your life and relationships to be.

【小题1】 of good listening
【小题2】hurts.
Building 【小题3】.
Allowing us to【小题4】and empathize, and viewing the world in an all-round way.
Bringing us wisdom over and above mere intelligence.
【小题5】the people around us feel worthy.
 Components of effective
listening
Good listening consists of two key communication skills: 【小题6】and verifying.
【小题7】 to be a
good listener
Listening to the speaker【小题8】.
Trying to be a 【小题9】listener.
Avoiding being affected by your emotions.
Waiting before you take 【小题10】.
Verifying.
Empathizing.
 


【小题1】Effects/Advantages/ Benefits
【小题2】Healing
【小题3】bridges
【小题4】understand
【小题5】Making 
【小题6】listening
【小题7】Ways/Tips
【小题8】attentively
【小题9】patient
【小题10】action

解析试题分析:文中叙述了要怎样做才能当一个好的听众,给出了六条建议。
【小题1】根据Listening heals hurts and builds bridges. It gives us the ability to understand and empathize, to view the world from our own point. It can bring us wisdom over and above mere intelligence. But most importantly, it allows us to give the people around us the gifts they crave (渴望) most—a sense of worth.我们可知这是说的是听的好处。
Effects/Advantages/ Benefits
【小题2】根据Listening heals hurts 可知填heal的适当形式,与下文Building...
Allowing …和Bringing…的形式相一致所以用Healing.
【小题3】根据builds bridges故用bridges.
【小题4】根据It gives us the ability to understand故用understand.
【小题5】it allows us to give the people around us the gifts they crave (渴望) most—a sense of worth.与上文的Building和Allowing的形式一致故用Making. 
【小题6】根据Effective listening is actually a combination of two key communication skills: listening and verifying (确认).故用listening.
【小题7】根据This is much easier read than done, so here are a few helpful tips.故用
Ways/Tips
【小题8】根据Give the speaker your full attention这里修饰动词所以用副词attentively.
【小题9】根据Be patient.故用patient.
【小题10】根据Hold your fire. Don’t jump to conclusions immediately. A good listener doesn’t react until comprehension is complete. 故用action.
考点:这是一篇记叙文。
点评:对于任务性阅读相对于前面的阅读来说是容易的,考查考生阅读能力,分析总结理解的能力。考查词汇了的用法及它们的派生词的用法,需要考生有扎实的基础知识。

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